The Holy Trinity of Tortilla Chips, Trading Cards, and Bartenders

When the Calendar Decides to Be a Little Unhinged
Today is one of those rare, beautiful days where the holiday calendar looks like it was assembled by a group chat that had too much caffeine and zero adult supervision. Somehow, we are being asked to collectively honor tortilla chips, trading cards, and bartenders all at once. That’s not a theme. That’s a vibe.

But honestly? It’s kind of perfect. Because these three things quietly say a lot about us as a society. We snack compulsively. We collect things emotionally. And we rely on strangers behind counters to hold our lives together — whether that counter serves queso, cardboard, or cocktails.

In Crunch We Trust
Let’s start with the tortilla chip — the unsung hero of social gatherings everywhere. Chips are not meant to be eaten alone. They exist for dipping, sharing, hovering over, and dramatically fighting over when someone double-dips. The tortilla chip has no ego. It shows up to parties, game nights, backyard cookouts, and bad days with quiet reliability.

The chip doesn’t judge you when you say you’re “just going to have a few.” It knows you’re lying. The chip understands you better than most people in your life. And honestly, that’s why we trust it. Crunchy comfort. Emotional support snack.

The Great Cardboard Obsession
Then there are trading cards — tiny rectangles of nostalgia that somehow still hold grown adults in a chokehold. One minute you’re eight years old trading baseball cards on the playground, the next minute you’re 38 years old explaining to your spouse why this “rare edition” is absolutely an investment and definitely not just clutter.

Trading cards are about hope. Hope that this one pull will be the valuable one. Hope that your childhood self was right about which athlete, character, or cartoon creature would one day be worth something. Mostly, though, they remind us that humans love stories. We like heroes. We like collections. We like believing that small things might someday matter more than they seem.

Cheers to the Unofficial Therapists of America
And finally, we arrive at bartenders — society’s most underpaid emotional support professionals. These are the people who witness first dates, breakups, career meltdowns, celebrations, confessions, and absolutely terrible flirting — often in the same hour.

Bartenders are where people go when they don’t want advice, just validation with ice. They hear your life story whether they asked for it or not. They smile politely when you overshare. They remember your drink order when half your friends don’t remember your birthday. Frankly, that’s heroic behavior.

The Unexpected Lesson in the Absurd
So what’s the moral of today’s odd little holiday trio? Maybe it’s that joy doesn’t always come wrapped in meaningful commemorations or deep symbolism. Sometimes it comes in chips and dip, dusty old collections, and conversations with strangers who don’t know your last name.

There’s something grounding about these small rituals. They’re ordinary. They’re a little ridiculous. And they’re deeply human. Maybe the calendar is reminding us that community doesn’t always look like grand gestures. Sometimes it looks like shared snacks, shared memories, and shared moments with people you didn’t even know you needed that day.

And honestly, that might be the most offbeat observance of all.